I have reached a very strange period in my life; that awkward time where the dream that you’ve had all your life seems so incredibly out of reach that even trying to achieve it seems utterly ridiculous. Yet, at the time something tells me that it is possible. I am on the edge of my childhood, and the world that seemed so big and open is now dropping down onto my shoulders. The irrational fear of failure and falling flat on my face is so present that dreaming too big seems dangerous. So I am left unsure for the first time of what I want to do, putting myself in a box, stuck and running around in circles, not allowing myself to see farther than what I think I can achieve. There are so many variables to consider, so many things that make me take a step back and doubt myself. What if I am not good enough? What if the one passion that I have isn’t something that I can succeed in? I never know, and every night it will be the last thing I think about.

With all of this fear and hesitation, however, comes a feeling of excitement. My kid eyes are still wide open, there is still that light that burns so bright in me. And I know that it is that light which will ignite me even in the darkest of times. I have to trust myself and my ability to be a compassionate person who truly wants to see change. I have to put all of my weight onto my talents and blindly follow the path that I can only hope will lead me to my dreams. And as hard as that is, there is also so much beauty in it.  There is so much of this earth I have yet to discover, so many lands my feet have yet to touch down on. And all these places have yet to discover me. The anonymity that I can bring to this world and all of its issues is part of what makes me so unique.

As normal and regular we might all believe ourselves to be, every single person has something that makes them different. We all have one thing, tiny as it may be, that makes us extraordinary. We owe it to each other to want to discover that side to every person we ever meet. As individuals we have the ability to sledgehammer down the walls that have been previously built for us and live outside of these restraints. As youth, we have the keys. We have the responsibility to instigate change and make a difference, and we can do it.

 

Art: Ilana Newman

Words: Ana Sandoval